Morning Rant: Don't tell me I NEED to straighten my hair!

My dad is guiltiest of this offense. When I went to the salon on Monday I ended up getting my hair straightened. Not my intent, but it happened. (Off topic, but not really: I completely wasted my money. The color didn't take because my hair is so dark, and the blowout lasted less than a day thanks to the crazy weather. I was pissed.) He veils his admonitions to go back to creamy crack with compliments:

"You look like a doll with your hair straight."
"Don't you like how it flows and moves when you walk?"
"Look how long it is!"
"When are you gonna get a perm again?" 

Fortunately within the months I've been natural, I've learned to ignore him most of the time and give quick comebacks the rest of the time: 

"They make dolls with afros."
"I like how my fro stays in it's place."
"Straightening it didn't make it longer."
"Never."

Of course I like the look of straight hair, otherwise I'd never bother to straighten it in the first place. But the idea that I need straight hair makes me want to punch someone in the throat. And that's the exact feeling I had when an ex-FB associate from college tweeted "I really don't understand wht is so wrong wit getting a perm. U realize we think u look much better wit straight hair. Dnt nobody wanna grab ur hair and can't get they hand out cuz it's caught n all that kinkiness."

So many questions, mainly "We who?" Cause my bf loves loves loves my coils and doesn't keep his hands out of my hair, unless it's straightened.  Also, why the hell do you think your opinion matters to anyone? Why are you worried about how attractive other women are besides your baby momma/fiancee? How are you talking this mess but still trying to holla at me and Big Sexy (my fro)?!

Yeah, I got a little heated. My point is, have your preferences, because I certainly have mine. But to tell me what I need to do to be more attractive to you when you and your approval aren't even on my radar in the first place? MFer have a seat.

Falling Off the Wagon

I am one of those people with a horrible propensity to start things vigorously but gradually fall off until eventually I'm not doin' a thing. This is particularly true when it involves some type of regimen. The multi-step teeth whitening process dwindled to just daily brushing, mouthwash rinse and occasional flossing (DJM!) and the skin care routine involving about five different products to be used nightly has come to just a good scrub in the morning and before bed.

The hair is slowly going the same way, but maybe if I put myself on blast I'll be more accountable to myself and to y'all. (Maybe... hopefully.) The slack started in the winter months when I was no longer doing wash-and-gos. I went from co-washing every other day to washing weekly or bi-weekly with shampoo and using a leave-in conditioner. Sadly, I don't condition as I should nowadays and I think I'm paying the price for it. I'm finding more and more of those little fairy knots, and my ends are looking a little rough even though I trim them from time to time. Plus (I don't know whether or not this is a result of lack of care) my hair is just limp, lifeless and won't do anything I want it to do. Not typical of Big Sexy.

I'm going to start babying my hair all over again, but I really need something simpler. A regimen with 50-11 steps just isn't going to work for me. As I stated when I first started, I'm lazy! I guess this is where a protective style would really come in handy, huh? Well I should be getting some just in time for graduation (Big Sexy doesn't play well with the graduation cap) so hopefully that will help some. But then what?

I need help y'all! Do you have problems keeping up with your routine? If so, how do you cope? Have you found something simpler, or do you just say "whatever!" and do pretty much nothing until the spirit moves you? C'mon, help me out!