So we are a little less than a month away from my BC. I figured I kinda needed to know where I was as far as length, so the other night after I washed it I took some pix. I'm sooo far from where I wanted to be at this point. :( See for yourself. But I'm gonna up my biotin game & hope & pray for the best.
I'm sooo slack, I know! I was supposed to have this posted on Saturday! But at least this way, I get to do two posts at once, so that makes it okay, right? LOL
I wore my two-strand twists Saturday & Sunday, then did a twist-out for yesterday. Today my twist-out is looking like a faux-fro and I LOOOOOVE it! This little experiment with my hair has me even more anxious to go ahead and cut it!
Anyway, on to the pix...
First pix of the twists. Not quite what I wanted, but decent for a first try!
Fresh twist-out. Wasn't feeling it too much at first...
So I decided to try my hand at two-strand twists tonight. For my first time, I think they're gonna be okay, although I wish I could've done them a little smaller than I did. (To kind of give you an idea of how big they are, I only have 34 of them. Yes, I counted!) I washed my hair using Optimum Oil Therapy Ultimate Recovery shampoo (yeah, I'm still using shampoo, although I know a lot of people don't...), then conditioned (Palmers Deep Conditioning Pure Coconut Milk, let it set about 20 minutes). Detangling went fairly smoothly, and although there was some hair loss, it wasn't enough to make a fuss over. I sectioned the hair off and got to twisting! I used Cantu shea butter to sculpt the twists & then put them on cold rods since I figured the relaxed ends would unravel otherwise. Sooo, here are two pix, front & back, taken before I got under the dryer. I have to have some heat, otherwise my hair would be damp all tomorrow & Sunday morning. So I put it on warm for about 10 minutes, then lowered the setting to cool for about 30. I'm excited to see how they turn out! I plan to keep them in until Tuesday, then do a twist-out Wednesday morning. We'll see how it goes!
It's been a long time coming, I know, but my promised interviews have begun! I could think of no better person to start with than my twin-cousin, Shari. She started her journey to naturalista status a few months before I decided to give it another go and has provided support and encouragement for me along the way! She is truly a Pretty Girl, inside and out, as you will see from the pix and the interview!
Name:Shari M. Briggs
Age: 24
Location: Tallahassee, FL
Occupation: graduate student
How long have you been transitioning/natural?
I have been transitioning for over 11 months
BC or no? If yes, was it planned for a certain length/date, or a spur of the moment type deal? If no, what styles do you use while transitioning?
I haven’t BC’d yet, but I will in a couple of weeks on my 25th birthday! I planned to transition from birthday to birthday and then BC. While transitioning, I have used several styles. In the early stages, I just flat-ironed my natural hair to blend with the relaxed hair. After that got tedious, I started trying out styles that more closely resembled all-natural hair: flat twists, straw sets, twist-outs, etc. Recently, I’ve resorted to sew-ins and braids because the 2 textures are “interesting” to deal with.
After her last touch up.
What made you decide to go natural?
There were a couple factors in my decision. 1) My college friends played a STRONG role in me moving off the fence. Everyone in my circle of friends, with one exception, has natural hair. Seeing them embrace their natural beauty inspired me to embrace mine. 2) Relaxers were ravaging my scalp beyond belief! I had horrible dandruff as well as a spot at the back of my head that would have large chemical burns, no matter what relaxer I used or how long it stayed on. It had gotten to a point where I just expected to have bad burns…
What has been the biggest challenge for you? Have you found anything to make the transition a bit easier?
My biggest challenge has been getting used to the fact that I can’t do the same things with my natural hair that I’ve done in the past with relaxed hair.I was highly upset a couple of months ago when I tried to wrap my hair! BIG mistake!I’ve had to let go of a lot of my tried-and-true hair products and hair styles.Getting to know what my hair likes and dislikes has been an interesting step in this process.
Have friends and family been supportive? Have you faced any criticism for your decision? My college friends have been the BEST! Each of them has helped me at some point on this journey, whether it was helping me pick out products to try or helping me pick out the right weave! My mother and father have been hilarious! My mom questions me because she remembers how thick my natural hair was as a little girl, but she has straightened my hair when I was home. I’ve nearly convinced her to go natural! My dad just jokes about who I’m going to be the next time he sees me because I change hairstyles so much now. LOL!
Her friend and hair inspiration, who is now one of MY inspirations!
Are there any particular products that you’ve become fond of or that worked well for your hair?
I’m actually still searching for something that will TRULY keep my hair straight in humidity; that has been tough.Other than that, my styles have not required much product other than setting lotion. I will definitely do more experimentation once I BC; then I will have more freedom in my style selection.
Some individuals in the natural hair community see permed hair as a sign of self-hatred or accepting a Euro-centric standard of beauty. What are your views on relaxed hair? Since I’m edging on the age of 25 and have had a relaxer since I was around 5, I really don’t see it as self-hatred and have no ill will towards relaxers or the women with them.Some people perm their hair because they don’t know how to truly deal with their natural texture; I’ve had to learn this along the way myself and I’m still learning.Also, women that are busy tend towards perms because they are definitely less time-consuming, from what I’ve experience thus far; I’ve considered slapping the creamy crack back in just to save myself some time.Yes, permed hair does give us more European features, but our hair so much more versatile than theirs will ever be! With that, I say, to each her own!
What tips or advice would you give others who are considering going natural? Make sure you are confident in the journey that you are about to embark on! Some people will love and embrace you; others will think you’re crazy. But in the end, it’s about loving yourself for who you are and not for whom others want you to be. Fight the good fight and resist the creamy crack!! LOL! Also, if you get discouraged, look up natural hair blogs and websites. They have saved me several times! Seeing other women’s hair journey has inspired me and gave me something to look forward to when I BC. I’m so excited! Lastly, surround yourself with supporters. Real friends won’t disown you because you change your hair…
Any additional comments concerning your experience?
I have three dates in mind that I'm looking at, but I have a length goal in mind too, so it may depend on whichever happens first. Since I'll be hitting 25 this year & that's a number of major importance to me, I was thinking of doing it on my birthday (May 15 in case you wanna start shopping for a present LOL). Then there is the cruise that I'll be going on in June. I really don't want to be dealing with hair considering the drunken debauchery fun I plan on getting into. Or I could put it off until July when I hit the one-year mark...
But then there's the length issue. Right now I'm looking at about two inches of newgrowth, with my hair at about 7" long. I'd really like to have 5" left once I cut the perm-- simply cuz I really think my face is too fat for anything shorter & I want to be able to play around with it some. I'm not sure if I'll be able to reach that goal by any of the dates I mentioned.
At any rate, I'll be doing the BC this year. I'm excited... and very very nervous! I'll try not to chicken out!
For those of you who transitioned from relaxed to natural hair, how long did you go before the BC? Or did you BC at all? For those that are still transitioning, do you have a set time or length in mind?
Twenty-four weeks. Twenty-four long, withdrawal filled weeks! Yes, it has been 24 weeks since my last hit of the creamy crack. I have amazed everyone--my stylist, parents, friends, coworkers-- by sticking with it this long. I have done much better than I did a few years ago when I attempted to transition. I credit having more support (thanks to a host of beautiful ladies online who are either already natural or transitioning like me), more education on the subject (internet came through on that too) and change in my personality as far as determination, self-expression and individuality.
Now I'm at that weird point where it's very obvious that I have two different textures going on. I did not get this far last time, so it's all new territory from here. I've been trying to hide the fact that all of my hair does not look the same. But since it's kinda hard to do that without heat, I'm limiting that. So now I have about two inches of thick, poofy waves and about five of straight hair. Honestly, at first I hated it. I looked at my hair and saw a struggle. It's a really weird feeling: I'm not ashamed of the natural hair, and I knew it would be different from the relaxed portion. I knew it would look like this once the transition was complete and I was okay with that. But seeing it with the relaxed hair... It was like bacon and ice cream. I LOVE both of em & I could eat both every day, but I ain't trying to sprinkle bacon bits on my sundae! (Sorry, I'm a little hungry.) My point is, I love both, but I didn't like the idea of them together. So what I've started doing is forcing myself to wear styles that basically show off both textures. I figure if I go ahead and put it on full display I'll be more comfortable when I do finally do the big chop. Will it work? Who knows, I'm not a psychologist. I'm just trying to find something--anything--to make the transition a little less shocking for myself...
It's only been 11 weeks since my last touch up. I thought I could at least make it to the four or five month mark before I started feeling like going back. There are two main things that are making me reconsider going natural. One is that the more I read the more I realize how much work and effort goes into the maintenance of natural hair. Call me ignorant, but I really did think that going natural would be easier. Then when I first started looking into it I was like "Okay, maybe a lil more to it than I thought, but I think I can handle it." Now I'm thinking "Maaaaaaan, I dunno!" With the perm I just wrap or roll my hair at night (or put it in a ponytail if I'm being lazy), take it down in the morning and go. 90% of the time it was flawless... The other 10% it stayed in a ponytail. My effort? On a scale of 1 to 10, I was maybe putting in 2.5. From what I'm reading and hearing from others, I'm definitely gonna have to change all of that. Time, energy, focus... I love my hair but I've never been one to spend forever doing it. So it's getting a little side-eye from me. The other thing is the growth. My hair was on a growing spree when I was getting a touch-up every 6-8 weeks. Now maybe it's all in my head, but I feel like my hair has just stopped. I'm sitting here like "Will I ever feel hair on my shoulders again?!" lol
On the other hand, I do have my reasons for sticking it out. One is that I want to prove my father and my ex wrong: my reasons for wanting to go natural had NOTHING to do with him. So if I go back to perming now that the relationship is over, it makes it look like they were right even though they were both dead wrong. I can't have that. Also, I love the versatility that comes with natural hair. If I just wanted to straighten my hair, I could still do that, but I could also rock a fro (which I've wanted since high school) or do an amazing twist-out like some of the pictures I've seen, or whatever! Options. I love that.
Even though I just started on my journey to napturality (eight weeks on Friday) I know that eventually I will get to the point where I find it difficult to manage having both natural and permed hair. Even though most people do the Big Chop, I'm not that bold; instead I'll probably just do little trims along the way. But I've started looking for styles that would work for me while transitioning. Any suggestions or comments would be appreciated! I've always wanted straw curls, and now that I have short hair, it may be an option for me. This model's hair is gorgeous! According to the poster from Hairmilk.com (where I sto- um, borrowed this pic from) this pic shows a flat twist. I am not familiar with this, but I want to give it a try! She gives a how-to in the post "Hair Care Diary: Headscarves, Solange, and Twistouts."
I've really liked Senegalese twists ever since I firs saw them (although I just learned their real name today!). I want to try these, but I know I wouldn't want to sit there for the amount of time it takes to get it done! I'm antsy enough after 2.5 hours at the salon. Don't braids/twists usually take forever?
I may just go to my old standby method: washing my hair, braiding it in cornrows, then taking it down after it dries... I liked that look when my hair was long, so it may be cute short too...
What other transition styles would you suggest? Are there any sites you frequent or YouTube channels you subscribe to with styling tips and how-to vids?
For several years (dating back to high school, maybe even middle school--can't remember) I have had a great stylist: my aunt. She has a salon and began doing my hair after my father quit doing it for me & my mom. She's a really good, old school stylist. She doesn't do many new styles ("new" being mid-'90s to now lol) which is cool with me since I've never been one to follow trends-- I've always been a wrap girl.
However, for all the great work she does, I'm not sure if I should stick with her while I transition into natural hair. Not that I don't think she can handle it; I'm quite sure that she can. The thing is, she doesn't want me to go natural and is not really helpful or supportive in my endeavor. Last year when I first told her I what I wanted to do, she straight up laughed in my face (the whole shop did, actually) and told me I wouldn't do it because my hair is too thick and I don't know how to take care of it. Then after a few months when I didn't know what to do with it, her advice was to get a touch up. Kinda counter-active to what I was trying to do, no? This time around, she just kinda grinned and said "okay."
My thing is this: I don't want to deal with any kind of discouragement from the person who is supposed to be helping me. After all, this is my hair we're talking about; whether I want to perm it, transition it to natural or shave it all off, I need someone to work with me. I need positive, helpful advice about what products to use, how to take care of it between salon visits, etc. I'm finding a lot of stuff online and it is helpful, but I need someone to see what type of hair I have and what works for me.
In my search for a new stylist, I've only found ONE salon here in Jackson that claims to specialize in natural hair. I know other black salons probably have someone who could help, but I want to be in an environment where I'd be comfortable, with other women who have gone through or are going through the process I'm undergoing.
Am I putting too much thought into this? Should I just stick with letting my aunt do my hair? For others who once wore relaxed hair and have gone natural, did you stick with your stylist, select a new one, or start doing everything yourself? I'd love to know!
